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Not familiar with that chestnut? Yes, they say things like that. Sex workers love talking about their married clients. But many of their stories are shockingly, well. And the emotional labor is a two-way street.
Some married guys try harder to please their prostitutes than they do the women they ostensibly promised to spend the rest of their lives with. We spoke to a dozen high-end escorts—the self-employed women who make more per hour than most cardiologists—and asked them to share their relationship secrets.
What do their married clients do right, and when do they screw up? With prostitutes, there are no games or emotional manipulation. If you want something specific, you have to ask for it. Whether your idea of a good time is gently spooning while she strokes your hair, or getting spanked while she calls you a dirty little man-bitch, you have to tell her up front. The same goes for the escorts. These prostitutes might be on to something, says Dr.
But there is some value in talking about the things you want—sexually and otherwise—with a little more openness and bluntness.
Take the emotion out of it, says Dr. Married men rarely visit prostitutes at night, and absolutely never on the weekend. Remember when sex with your wife used to be like that? Well, okay, for some of them maybe. A date night comes with zero risk. How do you recreate that sleeping-with-a-prostitute excitement, but without the exchanging-currency-for-sexual-favors part? People go brain dead in a marriage. You have to be willing to try things that make you uncomfortable.